Not Deep Enough To Scar

Ringing in my ears Fog clouding my head Tears pouring down my eyes, wetting my pillow My body trembles Sadness engulfing me Yet it’s comforting Constantly feeling like this Has brought on a sense of comfort I force my body to sit up My bed dipping slightly My hand reaches Grazing the wood shelf above my bed My hand searches for what it needs When it finds it, it holds on tight Bringing it down to eye level Watching the metal glint Before bringing it to my bare thighs Slicing quickly, but methodically Not low enough where people will see Not deep enough to need stitches or leave a big scar The blood bubbles up Tiny drops sliding down my legs Coating them In red I stop after 15 15 is all I do So I don’t get caught So I don’t get in trouble The blade is home It’s comfort