Not Me

A failed experiment Every cut is not on my wrist But someone else's Family and friend All feel distant Disconnected Just the kind I like You know me so well I might not even speak up You can talk for me As you always do I will stand Almost vertical Just slightly skewed Is that why my vision is blurred Do I need a new focus Is my mirror off Then why is it distorted My image isn't me The smile you see Isn't there Are you blind Or is that me Maybe it's just habit I never noticed Every meal I throw up Comes out if someone else's stomach Not mine A homeless child or wealthy aristocrat Who else is injured By my ministrations Hopeless I breath in water Instead of oxygen Clean and easy Not my style You thought you knew me Oh well Every pill I take Contributes to an overdose That doesn't belong to me I just killed another Aren't I such a sinner Why don't you come for revenge A knife to the gut Won't do much damage To someone barely there Lock me in prison Where I can rot further Sleep on the floor Walking on walls Is that why my brain rattles To one side I'm off balance Am I not symmetrical Walk with a limp One shoe on One shoe off Forgot to tie my laces Tripping Every noose around my neck Is a shackle On a slaves wrist Try to escape My legs are failing Can barely stand Should not have been created Not even human Not Any more Should be weightless Then why am I sinking Bottom of the ocean That's where I belong Wrecked Taking inspiration from the titanic Into an ice burg Freezing cold No different from usual Every sleepless night Adds another To some insomniac's List elsewhere Ringed eyes Im such an animal Stray dog Unwanted bitch Should have just died with the rest In some unmarked grave I volunteer as tribute To all those I left behind In the wake Of my destructive behaviour. But now I bid you goodbye Because as a failed experiment I should not be alive