Not My Fault..

For years and years I have been wondering what I did to deserve it I was just a child what did I know NOTHING whatever atrocity I committed before I got reincarnated I don't remember the pain that is boiling in my chest like a volcano that is ready to erupt the anger that follows me around the voices of me pleading to stop I don't want it I'm just a child what did I know NOTHING get off I don't want it I feel suffocated I'm claustrophobic I remember the confusion of being cornered it still feels like it was yesterday how do I trust I have trust issues I once spoke up about it and it was used against me I felt judged and very low in life at times I feel like I asked for it human beings are so cruel they guilt trip you victim blaming is tradition you have to watch your back even with the closest people to you since that day I hate having close connection with people I trust nobody everybody is an enemy to me how do I love while I rot of hate fear paranoia and anxiety of someone invading my personal space how do I rid myself of this feeling taking over me??