A Note To You
I am sitting in my room and I'm getting consumed
by these emotions and I feel like I am doomed.
I feel like I am trash that got swept by a broom.
I am in a bad mood listening to sad tunes.
I am feeling a lot of pain and don't want it to turn to hate.
I know she just can't help how she feels, but I still think she's great.
Maybe getting so close might've been a mistake.
How can I like her so much and not even been on a date?
I think this truly sucks because I really did like her.
Our situation is rough and I feel like I would fight for
her if I knew that she felt the same way.
I'm thinking about it now, who knows if she felt the same?
Maybe she is playing me just like I am a game.
Even if that is true, she is still the first thought in brain.
I like her even though she is the one to change
my stance on being single. That really isn’t the same.
I never really thought that I'd be down.
Relationships aren’t my thing and I know how that sounds.
This girl really has my head spinning around.
But now I feel like I'm the fool, a circus clown.
When we are together we always have so much fun.
You went back to your ex-boyfriend, so now I think I’m done.
You are intelligent, beautiful, and your future is bright like the sun.
But now that he is back in your life, I feel like he has won.
How can you expect for you and I to just be friends?
I need you to respect that I liked you and this is how it ends.
Last night I had a dream that I'm driving a Benz
Do you want to know if you were there? That depends
on how much that you like me, and if you are lying.
I never used to do this with girls, it was too much trying.
I feel like we are standing on the ground and I want to be flying.
When you first read this, I hope it doesn't leave you crying.
Even though I probably know the answer.
It is like breaking your leg on stage if you were a dancer.
Or bad news like a doctor who has just said cancer.
I'm surely going to miss all of our flirting and cute banter.
Now I want to tell you what I know you're going to miss.
You’ll miss my personality and the way I kiss.
You’ll miss messing with me and laughing in the bliss.
I never really thought that you'd walk away from this.
But you really did, so I know that it's over.
I have to move on in a straight line like a soldier.
I have to keep a straight face like I'm playing poker.
Now I put the good times in my memory folder.
Don't twist what I said, I really had a blast.
Now I have to move on and put you in the past.
I’m sad I couldn't prove you wrong, I think things went too fast.
If you know me, you know I hate coming in last.
I am thinking about it now and I just really wanted a chance.
I know it really sucks because the circumstance
that you are in doesn’t allow you to enhance
any feelings that you might've had at last glance.
I hope you remember that first time in the car.
When we kissed on the way home from the bar.
We went to the diner and then we came home. I was in awe
because that first kiss might've sent me to the stars.
Fast forward a couple months and now there's just a scar
from that time you grabbed my back, and then you clawed.
I didn’t realize losing you would be this hard.
Oh my god, I really should've been on guard.
I'm not going to lie, all that pain really hurt.
But what I'm feeling now is so much worse.
I can't even describe it nor put it in a verse.
I hope you get to graduate and become a nurse.
I don't want to be malicious, I just want the best for you.
I have some things going on and I don't want to stress you too.
You say that you like me, but who knows if that’s really true.
Now I'm doing my own thing just like I was blessed to do.
I would give up everything, I'd even give up the world.
I would give up anything so I can call you my girl.
If you were with me, I'd buy you diamonds and pearls.
That is not all if you entered into my world.
I would tell you everything and you'd have all my trust.
I would be the perfect boyfriend because that’s a must
and even after years together there would still be lust.
Anything that I would do, we have already discussed.
It would be all laughs and we'd even have a date night.
We’d have it on a rooftop as long as you’re not scared of heights.
I’m looking at the city and I'm seeing all the pretty lights.
I would be mesmerized just because you’re in my sight.
But I know this won't happen and it’s not even a might.
Don’t get the wrong idea, this is not out of spite.
The reason that I’m writing this is I am just kind of tight
because you tell me you're going left, and then you make a right.
If we were together I know that we would never fight
because if we argue, I would just say you are right.
When I make a lot money I would take you on a flight.
Or we can just go to the park and watch our kids fly kites.
I have a lot of things going on and I don't know what to write.
I just wish you were a princess so I could be your knight.
Just tell me you still like me even if it's only slight.
Even though you won't pick me, so this must be goodnight.
I wake up with a multitude of mixed emotions.
My feelings keep on shifting and changing like the oceans.
Should I really show her this? There might be a huge commotion.
I decide to give it to her, but I’m moving in slow motion.
I know I have to give it to her, I have to show her how I feel.
I can’t do it in front of her though, my face I can’t reveal.
I put it in her mailbox and now I know it’s real.
I know it would mean more to talk to her and this is not ideal.
Everyone has that one person, one relationship that they can say changed them.
How do I know if this is that relationship and if it is not, how will I know when?
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