Numb

The coffee used to burn down my throat

Blades once felt sharp and cold against my wrist

Once I could feel the way it hurt

But now I only seek the thrill of agony

Walking blindly on the streets 

Not caring for the presence of an incoming car

Skipping meals for days for the thrill of it

To see if today will be the day where I faint

And embrace darkness for the last time

Just for the thrill to see if I can

Escape the numbness that cloaks me

Looking for even the slightest emotion

But nothing arrives as I scream and cry

So I continue to stand in the cold without a jacket

To let the cold beat my cheek and tears sting my eyes

For a feeling is a feeling even if it is artificial