Numb

You know who you are,

I open the window, 

because I know how uncomfrotable you get otherwise.

I lay in the dark waiting for you. 

Where is he? Is he coming?

I shiver, covering my goose-bumped body,

while sweat drips off your back from the heat of another woman. 

Are you thinking of me?

Do I even cross your mind,

the way she ran through yours all night?

Does she know about me?

Flashes of the pieces of her that I can't get out of my head. 

An anchor on her ribcage, 

the outline of her breasts in her bare skin shone by my little light.

Her wide eyes; jittering, scared of the unknown. 

Does she know you like I know you?

Does she know the taste of your lips on her tongue?

Has she felt the weight of your body on hers?

Has her mouth been where mine has?

How well do you know her?

Have your lingering fingertips grazed her sweaty skin?

Do you know what she tastes like in her not so sacred places?

Was it worth it? 

To be warm for a minute?

My heart raced of worry,

as  I opened the door.

Until it dropped of shock.

Breathless.

My hands shook out of control,

as if they had minds of their own.

I am numb.

-the girl with the strength to forgive for her own sake