An Ode to NJ and AJJ

Oxygen or Nicotine

I'm not sure what lets me breathe

Sympathy or apathy 

I'm not sure what makes me bleed

The next line has room for me

But I'm not sure which words would be

Fitting and willingly come from my mouth

Naivete in philosophy and curses spewing out of me 

Make it hard to figure out

Whether it's tomfoolery or lack of productivity

Or fear of me and disbelief that conjure the doubt

So I sit and eat the potpourri 

Think to myself so carefully about my friends and family 

And how to spit it out

Think change is good apparently but my mind drifts unbearably

Wondering what'd my parents be 

If their hearts gave out

If I endure despairingly and live a life of charity and worship oh so daringly

Will I live throughout?