Oh, What Depressive Thoughts!

Location

My depression feels like so many things all rolled up into one.

At it's worst, it is overwhelming sadness and a certainty

 that I am not good enough and that no one could

ever really love me.

It feels that no matter how hard I try, I will never be worthy.

It's an emptiness inside that can't be filled.

 I feel tired with no energy to do anything. At the same time,

I feel as though if I don't keep moving the blackness

 will swallow me whole. I cannot summon the strength to

get up and do something. So I stay stuck in this black hole

 that I can't climb out of.

 I eat, sleep, and go to work because I have to.

Nothing brings me pleasure.

At its best,

 I am still a little tired but I feel like spending time

 with friends and doing things.

I find pleasure in emotions again.

 I still have a voice inside whispering that I'm not

good enough but I tell her to shut her hole and live my life.

 I know I am loved and try hard to remind myself of that.

 

Comments

Need to talk?

If you ever need help or support, we trust CrisisTextline.org for people dealing with depression. Text HOME to 741741