Once It Starts, It Never Stops

I did it love, I let it loose, I opened that door, I pored my heart out... Last night I found myself truly alone Trying to sleep, I found myself thinking. And as the last bit of thought rushed from my mind As I was moments from blissful sleep, peace ...I thought about it. You know it, you know it well. My one true fear. Not clowns, not ghosts, not even hell. Forgive me, for I can't speak it's name again. But I thought it, and shot wide awake! The first tear came then, and they just kept coming. My breath came only with great effort. My eyes leaked profusely and I couldn't think of why. The more I tried to stop, the longer I tried to forget, the greater the crying became. It was like I was possessed by a ghost of a memory. The memory wasn't mine but it still took me over. Pictures danced in my head like demons and tears fell to the beat. Well...that went on for a while but don't worry for my sake. My fears have never left the back of my mind before. And I feel relieved...I couldn't share my tears before but I did last night. I shared my fears through tears in my sheets and pillows. Now I've wiped my eyes, and I'm writing my sorrows down So you my love can read them and know I'm fine. I'm better than fine because I finally admitted my fears. I lost it last night, I couldn't stop for hours But the demons that tortured me all my life poured out quickly Compared to the harm it would've done if I never let it go I'm done crying my love, and now, I'm ready to hear you fears. Let me be your pillow and sheets to cry into. Once the tears start, they never truly stop. So I don't mind being there until they slow at least.