One Sided Love by Choice

Every girl wants to love and be loved

He loves me 

But I won't let him

My guard is up

It can't be knocked down

My body and mind tense whenever he's around

He gives me everything I want and need

The kind of love I should be grateful to receive

He tells me I'm the girl of his dreams

He tells me to relax 

But submissiveness is a quality I lack

I try to let go but I always end up holding back

My fear of being loved is a curse

I just can't let myself immerse 

I'm scared if I start loving him, the roles will reverse

I'll end up loving him more 

And he'll start to fade

Giving him my heart will be my worst mistake

Or I can keep shutting him out

Everytime he gets closer

To knocking down my wall, and winning my heart over

A one sided love by choice

Why must this be?

Why can't I love him as much as he loves me?

My fragile heart refuses to be set free

And wi