Only Ending I Know (working title)

How should I have expected this to go

when my heart's as vast

as the moment you first felt love

yet only as deep

as you on your knees blowing my brains out

like I should've done to save you from thinking

two broken people could make a whole

or that sensual sensations could supplement self-esteem

now that I see you steamed and your eyes dripping with the blood of  dreams I imposed on you

It was my fault

I was the "lie" at the heart of your "believe"

my pretty intentions

masked parasite-al desires

that diluted your spirit

and desecrated our deformed union

I loved you as honestly as I could

and my regrets lie only at our end

I found myself with a boundless capacity for compassion

with no cause to care for,

but to caress you calmed me

and kept me coming back consistently

convinced we'd create a ceaseless companionship

but calamity crushed us from my own careless conscience

and left me cynical