An Open Letter from a Closed Casket

I can survive in the dark. When I was much younger, it scared me. I slept with a night light on And kept my door open a bit, In case I had to run away. Now I am comfortable here. My head burns with cruel recollections. My feet ache from wearing down their uses. My hands crack like a sculpture, war-torn and beaten. My face faded in and out of your peripheral vision. I hate being alone with my thoughts. I want to scream from the top of my lungs- "Look at me please, dear god, I am alive!" "Look at me please, my captor, am I enough?" Why do I need everyone more than they need me? I'm gonna sit there and smile and nod And pretend like I'm happy. I haven't been happy for a while, And each day it gets worse. I wanted this one to rhyme. But if it did it wouldn't be real. If I didn't write it all down, I'd be worse off than I already am. It's not easy, Being. Fuck you, I hate this, Fuck all forgiveness, To hell with the good times They never existed. Pretend you never read this. I'll pretend I never wrote it. Everything will be fine.