An Open Letter From a Closed Door

Mom, Dad

I know you are both proud of my endeavors

And have hearts that are eager to hear me

I like to be able to tell you everything

But sometimes

Your "little girl" is feverish and without prescription

The symptoms are difficult to articulate:

Closing her bedroom door for hours

Her throat twisted, choked with uneasy tears

For God knows why

I never really know why

I know every time I do this you question your parenting

You never want to say that I’m the D word

Disappointment, distant, different

But I know that it’s frustrating when my light switches off so quickly

Separating me further from you

And all you want to do is scream at me

WHY

I would really love to share with you

There’s so much for me to say

But there’s a door at the back of my tongue that

Slams shut, every now and then

Gnawing away every word that comes up

And as I see your eyes release the glisten that was once there a second before

All I want to do is scream

WHY

Doesn’t anyone have an answer?