The other side of waiting

I know the feeling of being an object of contemplation, uncertainty, calculations.

I know how it feels when someone 

sits back and works maths on you,

on the probability of something 

happening between you two.

It’s the most frightening feeling.

Because then you choose you

and unchoose you over and over

again on their worksheets 

until they are brave enough

to make a choice that is workable 

by reasoning but by faith.