Our Tragedy

I’m left alone to miss you most

Fighting with memories that let you close

Ones that drown me and leave me gasping for air

Reminding me of how much I used to care

My days would be warm and bright

But when you came, a wildfire would ignite

At first, I thought it was a good thing

Until I heard the sirens ring

You were disguised as a beautiful dream while being a nightmare

You were my drug and I was so unaware

Until the time I needed you most

And you were always so high, you wouldn’t give me a dose

Instead, you beat me with tainted words that left me quiet and unheard

Even though I left, I still remember them word for word

I remember you would yell and scream

Telling me to throw away my dreams

Ones that had meant the world to my beaten soul

The dreams of being a writer, or going to Seoul

You told me if I loved you

I had to drop everything at your cue

I wasn’t allowed talk to friends that I’ve known for years

Because you didn’t trust me around my peers

I could no longer wear things that showed any skin

Because you couldn’t have anyone looking at your sin

But whenever I wanted to leave, you begged me to stay

You would tell me you loved me, and I was the person that kept your troubles at bay

You would say, “I need you more than you know...”

My heart would always break when I would hear you finish with, “more than I show.”

You broke me and did it in spite

But even now, without you somethings don’t feel right

I hate you but I don’t regret a thing

Even after everything

Because now I know what I need

Now I know it’s not you, indeed

But rather someone who is kind and cares

Someone who will stay with me if I have nothing or am a millionaire

Someone who wants me to grow instead of pulling me down

I need someone who will always love me, and not just when people are around

Someone who isn’t you

Someone who paints me colorful and not black and blue

Because you didn’t love me, you loved the idea of me

You loved the person you wanted me to be

But I will never be anyone other than myself

So I will place our tragedy on a dusty, forgotten bookshelf