An Outside Insider

When I'm on the inside from the outside I'm still on the outside in the inside

Where my money is no good

Or I speak with a tone that's foreign to hood

Either way they expect me to be the same

And consciously here to blame

In other words they have me miss understood

A tree to few, and firewood to many

The thought alone helped me value my own being

Who would value me if I did not do that of which for myself

I betrayed myself before I had the chance to betray any being

I neglected me in the presence of others

I tried cascading stones for others

While I could never lift a pebble for myself

How could I look past what I have been craving?

The love of others?

Or the unjust love I never had for myself

By looking at the drowning clocks of others I found that the person I truly should have been engaged with all alone was me...

By any means, who else would care to reverse minutes to do the same?

Only me...

An outside insider