Overthinking, Underfeeling

how curious it must be

to feel your own heart beating

warm and pulsing

as you know without a doubt

you're still alive

i wonder what it feels like

the pain in my head is not the same

though it does let me know

i still exist

i am hollow and cold

my thoughts echo around my body

bouncing from where my lungs should be

as if it doesn't matter at all

that I have torn my heart open with my own hands

and found nothing inside

it hurts

i hurt

my head is begging me for relief

i cannot let it 

arms, legs, lungs

all useless

how else will i know that i'm alive?