Pain

I sit in a room, just staring at the wall wondering what life would have been like without you at all. I try to forget all the hurt you left me with, because all I can remember is how happy I felt. I use to melt into your arms and swim in your passion. Instead I just see colors clashing. I try to flush the red, but I can tell its almost the end. I feel my heart beating in my chest, slow pumps in and out. I start to think what is life really about. I gave you my heart a long time ago and now I'm holding on so tight I can't let you go. Its like I'm fighting for something you never wanted, but you played me like a chello and I got lost to be honest. Now that I know I shouldnt want it, I can protect myself from upcoming pain, but I will still carry you along in my luggage because you scarred me for life and there isnt a bandage big enough for coverage.