Pain

Pain

I wish I could sleep

But in the back of my mind you still creep

As I lay in my bed

The memories and pain are stuck in my head

Even when my eyes are opened or closed

I keep seeing myself laying there exposed

The more I try to struggle and scream

The more you are zoned in to your own kind of sick dream

The pain won’t go away

It just gets worse day by day

Somedays I just don’t want to get up

I just want to lay there and stay numb

Everyday this would happen, you’d promised me it would be the last time

You lied to me but that is the least of your crimes

It makes me so upset that you are happy and free

And I am stuck here alone and afraid to let someone touch me

You have successfully destroyed my life

While you are about to start yours with a brand new wife

My eyes are stinging, trying to fight the tears

I can’t believe I dealt with this pain for so many years!

Why did it have to be me?

Why couldn’t you just leave me be?

I tried to tell people, but no one would believe

Not even the people closest to me

I can try to hide the pain and misery

But the messy hair and puffy eyes unveils the mystery

I keep asking myself what I did to deserve this

I even made a list!

But nothing on that list deserves a punishment this severe

I really just want to scream and cry for help!

Ha, but that did nothing last time I tried that route

For the rest of my life this pain will never leave

The memories keep taunting, and haunting me

So as I sit here in the dark all alone

Thinking about questions that are still unknown

I’m thinking of how to get rid of the pain

But there is no way, it will forever remain