A Panda-ering Life
As the pandas die off, so do I
But I’ve been told lie after lie
That I am fine
That I’m only hyped
On some “cute” delusion
“But, is it a delusion?”
I ask in utter confusion
And i reach this subtle conclusion
That it’s really a form of restitution and major revolution
“Someone just gave me a panda!”
Before the pandas, I was in eighth grade.
The kid with all of the attention
But none of the aid.
The teen with no friends,
But the center of all of the rumors made.
The woman who was lonely
But alone never stayed
Then, someone gave me a panda
This could have been the pope, my mother, or a boyfriend
Point is, I named it Michael Scott
This felt like the beginning of an end
Of social rejection and emotional isolation
I finally had a friend
That I didn’t need to talk to
For him to understand
The struggles that I was forced to face everyday
Michael’s purple eyes
Made me realize
That I could be calm in moments I despised
But in eighth grade this was simply something I could idealize
I could not realize anything Michael’s eyes helped me see
Because I had not become me
“I love pandas!”
I never knew who hated me
But i assumed it was a universal feeling
I started watching documentaries about pandas
And they made isolation seem appealing
I started to appreciate the fact
That I was never quite revealing
At this time I was always almost starving
Much like pandas, I never knew what I should be eating
I ate all the wrong things or rarely ate
I was so underweight
And I could only relate to how the pandas ate
This made me less self-conscious
Of what I had on my plate
Pandas may have trouble with reproduction
But they still have better sex lives
Than the chess club whose closest sexual function
Is to penetrate their opponent’s defense
Maybe pandas just need girth control
“Bigger D’s for pandas, please!”
And while pandas have sex once a year,
Dennise has it none a year.
And while Dennise changes and matures,
pandas remain as stubborn as a bear
Other than our sex lives,
We are really quite similar
If necessary or provoked
We can become natural killers
We defend our families till the end
But we are really quite dimmer
Most of the time
We just sit there, eat, and think about TV dinners
Similar to how pandas eat chutes and leaves,
We can also eat, shoot, and leave.
“I am like a panda!”
I used to be simply comforted by the fact
That pandas act the way I act
Then I started to change
To evolve and attract
Maybe it was more of a rebirth
The egg i was trapped in, finally cracked
Or maybe I was simply maturing
In a way, this is like aging back...wards
These were more than just changes
Every little thing I did was much like a panda
I would eat endlessly but my weight remained in the smallest of ranges
And much like my time working on these stanzas
Pandas are most active in the earliest stages
Of the day.
Their lives are based almost entirely on efficiency
While they leave one of their cubs behind,
I only stick with friends with more than enough self-sufficiency
I’ve grown to become this large symbol
Black and white in a world full of grey areas
I’ve matured into a panda with nimble
Wits and with a mentality that nothing is serious
I can finally see what Michael’s eyes helped me see
Because I have finally become me
“I am a panda!”