patiently waiting

it's 4am and im not feeling sleepy at all

it keeps me wide awake, worrying

the silly little details that will not matter when i look back

New Years was only a couple days ago and im starting a new life

insecurity when i have more than one person that adore every little flaw that i have

worrying when i know my god is under control over every problem

depression when i try to make the people around me all smiles

feeling unworthy when i know i have someone who thinks im good enough

everynight i feel terrible

wanting to run away and wonder, who will worry and look for me first?

crying every now and then because im as sensitive as pouring bleach on to a coloful piece of clothing

crying; wanting to be appreciated more like the last diamond on earth 

a girl like me only wants to be loved and wanted

a girl like me who would rather feel numb inside.

hoping one day i will pour out my heart to someone who i trust and wouldnt mind