The Perfect Mixture

Dear Society,

 

I Am A Mexican American Woman, Not just Mexican and not just American. I am both, equal parts, no matter what and always will be.

Growing up in California I have never felt like I belonged here.

My name was too hard to pronouce.

For the Americans I went to school with. The saying "If I had a dollar for everytime my name was said or spelled wrong, I would be rich" Hits a little too close to home. Over 23 years I have learned to expect people to say or spell my name wrong. I learn to apologize for my name being too difficult to say or spell. My name, something that you identify with. Most of Society doesn't even take the time to learn how to say or spell my name. It's too ethnic so I would change the way I said it to the American version. When I was in elementary school I was put into an english as a second learners class without being tested. I was just shoved into a class I didn't even need. The first day they sent me back because my English was just as good as all the other third graders in my class. I went home upset, as a third grader I couldn't understand why I was placed into a class like that when my English was stronger than my Spanish. That year I went to mexico to do my first communion and my Spanish was not good enough. No matter where I was I didnt fit in. It has really made me questioned how cultured I am. In the US I wasn't "American" enough, in Mexico I'm not  "Mexican" enough. It's been hard as a Latina to find my voice and how I honor my culture in a world that has indentified as neither here nor there. As a Mexican American Woman I continue to face barriers but I will continue to be proud of my culture and Honor myself before anything else.

Signed,

 

Noemi 

 

Proud Mexican American Woman