A Plastic Bag

these days are dark and the nights are longer,

a cloud is heading my way but its darker than any other,

theres nothing i can do to stop it from suffocating me,

i lay here thinking about everything i cant see,

im depressed so i dont want to think about tomorrow,

i feel so exposed like a plastic bag floating in the air

ive still got the rest of the world to explore, but cant with these eyes watching,

i cant take this pressure with all these blinking eyes,

what is it that makes me noticable?

my hearts beating rapidly pounding onto the outside bone,

can i live like this, like everybody else?

my heads banging, this choice im not willing to make!

the beat i hear the same noise of my heart falling,

my soul is with the enemy but my hearts in the right place,

my heads some place else but i know where my feet are,

my words are my feelings some may not find them appealing.

Theres days i dont feel human, the blood in my veins flows cold,

most days my heart beats rapidly theres no stopping the hardcore beats, leaving hardcore bruises,

theres days that my heart dont beat in rhythm,

the broken glass i hold loose in my hand reflects that of an unsettled soul,

im far lost amongst the cloud to notice my feet are not touching the ground.

ive got my ok trainers on with a matching hat,

ive got my black jeans on with a matching hoodie,

my inhaler in my left pocket with my phone fully charged in my right,

my moneys in my back pocket while my fists are held tight,

my heart beats rapid, my nervous system break,

in and out of my bedroom keeping my thoughts kept close,

my insides are melting 'coz i know whats coming,

im going to run away and not think about anything other,

im losing sight of whats real 'cause theres no love left here,

i fear what most wouldnt think to fear, thats happiness,

these walls are watching me, so many people counting on me.

dreams are big, imaginations high, expectations sky high,

the paths are never ending, the view is amazing, my thoughts are mine,

the sky is clear with the friendly sun, family has vanished in thin air,

the days drag, the nights darken so the roads unclear,

obstacles in the way so my plans go through the window,

i just wanted people to listen not to give me advice,

ive just lost contact with the real world, so i have nothing left to say,

the wind blows hitting me like a plastic bag throwing me into oncoming traffic.

Theres days i dont feel human, the blood in my veins flows cold,

theres days when my heart beats rapidly, theres no stopping the hardcore beats leaving hardcore bruises,

theres days that my heart dont beat in rhythm,

the broken glass i hold loose in my hand reflects that of an unsettled soul,

im far lost in the clouds to notice my feet are not touching the ground,

The paint smells fresh but thats all thats left,

my brains smoking, my oxygen tanks full but my tears are burnin,

my energy level is low so music is all ive got to get me through,

the grass is wet and the sun is so hidden the thunder roars,

my family are getting stronger day by day, but im losing the fight to live,

the light shines through the bullet holes left in my chest,

three and counting as i make myself crawl through the day,

entering the black 'n' white streets where surviving is the only way of life,

the nights are getting stronger and im getting weaker for worse,

im feel lazy, flying higher and higher into the night, reaching thin air,

a plastic bag as empty as i was full.

29 April 2011