?

Do you ever wonder if the pain will ever stop?

We’re all just lonely people and innocent

We just want a little love to shield the pain

We all want a little happy to hide the tears 

When all the darkness is caving in

And we don’t know where we’re going 

But love will guide the way 

And we both know what we're doing 

Just lying to our faces

I can’t think of what to write because I’m broken inside 

I love to sing about all the lies 

That I makeup in my head

I create all the little stories of all the broken and the lost

I destroy all the memories of all the happiness and the love

I am worth nothing at all

Got no purpose, got no hope

I’m just lost in my thoughts 

Can’t feel nothing at all

Just a shadow of what was

Just a ghost of what I lost 

Can’t feel nothing but the pain 

The pain of living

Like i have anything to say

I just a little girl with big dreams

Lost outside of reality

I can’t tell you everything because I know you will think I am weird and insecure 

But there is this darkness inside of me that i can’t get rid of.

And i guess everyone has a little bit inside them 

But mine seems to get worse every day

I am not a harm to myself or others 

I am a harm to the universe

I can’t handle the stress of everything

I feel like everything is my fault

It’s my karma that everything goes wrong

It’s my fault my brother acts out and is always impatient

It’s my fault my sister seems lost in life and seems to distract herself from reality

It’s my fault my mother is obsessed with her phone and went through so much

And it’s my fault my father died

It’s my fault that my stepfather is always stressed and angry

It’s my fault that I just sit around and cry like a little baby

Maybe I never grew up and i can’t seem to be tough

I act as if everyone is out to get me 

And if they are not I am jealous of them 

I am so insecure that i have to constantly compare myself to others

I will never be good enough

And sometimes i love being in pain because that is all that i am

One messy pile of pain that will never be healed

I should have killed myself a long time ago

I don’t know why I haven’t but now I am more depressed than ever before

I don’t know how to stop it or control it or not let it in

I am lost in what I should do with my life

It seems everything I wanted to be was out the window

And I act like i am physically impaired because i am mentally impaired

My pain is just a joke to everyone

Something i created just like my mental illness 

Which just seems to get worse

My mom thinks i need to express more 

But every time I try to feel 

I feel worse

I can’t speak I can’t breathe

And nothing I have to say is worth listening because it is all a lie

My whole life is a lie 

Everything I felt wanted to feel or never will feel is a lie

All my memories are filled with depression and lies

Nothing is real anymore

I am not real anymore

The world is a joke and I am a lie

A made up story

A fucking story that no one will remember because it is all a fucking lie

Everything about me is wrong

Everything i do is not right 

And everything i am is never going to be okay

I can’t relate with anyone because i am not the same

I don’t even think I am human anymore

Some subspecies that is supposed to be extinct

I am not “fit” for this world or society

And that is why I need to kill myself

No matter what I do 

I know this is the end goal 

I just don’t know when and where

My throat keeps hurting everytime I feel anything

I guess feeling equals pain

There is no point to emotions 

Just useless way to make life more complicated than it is

More people just need to realize that life is always going to suck 

And there is nothing we can do about it 

There is no more good in this world 

The world is going to end and you know it

There is no purpose to anyone's life

There is no reason for why we exist other than a cruel joke from this galaxy

You think we are the only ones here 

We think we know so much and we are smart

But we all are just dumb and stupid and don’t know what the hell we are doing

We think we are helping 

Protecting

But really we are just messing the world up

That is why i need to kill myself

Because nothing is ever going to get better

People are still going to get hurt

People are still going to want to hurt others and themselves 

And the world is going to end with no one accomplishing anything but their own destruction