The Poppies Living in Lancaster

Hey

Do you remember the poppies of Lancaster?

Those very poppies that once made me dream of all the good in the world?

You were the orange flower that I dreamed about every summer and that I hoped for every spring. 

You were all I had, you were all I could see, the field was endless so long as I cuddled with you when the sun set.

I'd never be ready, I'd come to find out.

Because the poppies fade in the winter and the ground grew immensely colder.

I grabbed the soil in my hands

I watched the rumble fall through my fingers and within it all, I couldn't see you anymore.

All I could do is watch, but I couldn't move, I couldn't feel.

I couldn't feel anything but the roots growing over my thighs.

My knees became bruised as I waited for spring again.

I knelt down, screaming at the ground. I begged for you and only you. 

I ignored the trees.

No rain came

I ignored the beetles

No ladybugs came.

I ignored everything else that this field had to offer because all I wanted was to watch the colors in the atmosphere shift with you again.

Hey

Do you remember how you changed my world?

That very world that was full of orange glitters?

This world is one I don't want to be in anymore. 

My body has turned to bones and my knees are half way into the ground.

But I promise

I'll change this world. Because you changed mine. And I know that my bones will help grow the ticket that will grant me the ability to come see you again.

Let's get out of Lancaster.

June will come again.

January will leave too.

To the one I lost on January 10th 2016.

To the one I fell in love with on June 16th 2007.

To the one that I dreamt about for years to come and save me.