Positive Relationship With Myself

Things I would tell myself that I know now that I wish I knew back then

I would tell her that she is beautiful despite being called otherwise

I would let her stand in the mirror then tell her to stand there for as long as she needed so she can memorize every special detail about herself, because I love you

How her eyes remind her of the dark coffee her grandfather used to drink every morning before he went to work

How her mouth is shaped like a bow on a present so great it’s like birthdays, Christmases, fourth of Julys, and New Year’s eves all wrapped up in one

How her nose is like a button on her favorite pair of jeans that she refuses to throw away even though the material has worn through on the thighs

How her teeth are slightly crooked because her laugh was so hearty and unique that her teeth felt obligated to change just a little

How her stretch marks are just road maps to adventures that only a man she deemed worthy and special enough to partake in could travel

I would make sure she knows how wonderful she is

I wouldn’t allow her to stand there and criticize every flaw and mistake

Things I would tell myself that I know now that I wish I knew back then

If she came home from school with salty raindrops falling down the rounded hills of her cheeks

I would tell her I understand how it feels to be laughed at when you have no idea what’s so funny

That being different is okay despite your peers, the media, society, and who was once your closest friend and first love telling you it wasn’t

If I saw her with smeared makeup, disheveled clothes, and emptiness in her eyes I wouldn’t yell at her, I would explain why he said she was good enough for him to use but not good enough to acknowledge her in public

I would tell her to never settle for less than what you deserve

I will tell her that when she meets him, he would be like a rainbow after pouring rain on a sunny day to your emotions

He will embrace her as if she was the sun and he was just so lucky to be in her rotation

He will wash away her insecurities that have dirtied her mind and shielded her by manifesting itself into baggy clothing and a turned down head as a signal for wanting to feel invisible

He will wash it away with his love and his lips

He will pay close attention to every stretch mark he finds from the crook of her elbow, to the back of her knee, to the ones that decorate her stomach

Wherever they are, he will hold her hand, link fingers like praying hands because she is an answered prayer for him

Things I would tell myself that know now that I wish I knew back then

I would tell her that if ever you bared your deepest insecurities to a group of people you barely know then you are one step closer to loving yourself the way that you should