Power over Pain

Falling into darkness,
Sinking into nothing.
They think I'm fun and smiling,
I'm really only bluffing.

I feel like an old sweater
Put too much through the wash.
It now is gray and dirty,
Once bright orange as a squash.

They think I live an easy life,
Golden pavement all the way.
Would anybody really care
If I just went and died today?

As I thought these gloomy thoughts
I stepped into the open air.
The wind cleaned out my cobweb thoughts,
Reminding me that someone cares.

I pulled his face from memory,
The only one who ever Knew
What to say and where to go,
The one friend Time has proven true.

He sees through my deception,
The smiling iron mask.
In his hands he holds my heart
Of shining fragile glass.

I fear that he will break it
But I will not take it back,
For without him it's inevitable
That it would truly snap.

He does not know he holds it.
I keep that to myself.
I'd rather have it in his hands
Than sitting on the shelf.