Praying for London

There’s a void in my heart…

Have you ever been in love? I am…

I wake up every day to the love of my life and I know I got lucky because I found my soulmate. 

Why I don’t feel lucky then?

I’m trying to convince myself that girls can have it all but in the end, can we?

It seems like we always have to choose between the guy and the life we want for ourselves.

Only there’s no choice for me. It will always be Aaron.

It doesn’t change the fact I cry every day nor the feeling of imprisonment that hunts me wherever I go.

Love should be enough. So why isn’t it?

Fifty percent of my life is perfect. 

The relationship part is not easy yet somehow stays imperfectly idyllic.

And then real life catches up to me and I’m out of breath.

America is Freedom. 

American Dream. 

American Fantasy.

I’m out of breath…

There was a time when real life was easy.

Not perfect but imperfectly idyllic. 

There was no time for no man but there was plenty of love for the world. 

Only few could catch a glimpse of who I really was.

And I was fine with it.

Then you came in. And you ruined it. And I could never come back.

Why? Why did you show up?

With your big eyes and your kind soul.

With your smile that could steal millions of hearts.

Sometimes I wish I could go back.

But then I don’t.

So tell me. What’s gonna be?

Will you ever set me free?

I’m out of breath.

American Dream.