The Princess and the Pea

Once upon a time, like all these stories go
There was a prince who was a rather small and round fellow
He was looking for a princess, who was perfect and fair
Who had sparkling eyes and flowing, long hair
The prince could not find a princess who was right
So he looked out, sad, on a stormy night

Suddenly, there was frantic knocking on the door
There stood a woman, who had water dripping all on the floor
She claimed to be a princess, but the weather destroyed her attire
The staff, the prince, and his mother thought she was a liar

The mother held the prince in her hand
"We'll give her a test to prove her worth," was something she did demand
They gave the princess a room, with a mattress stack far above her head
Then the mother placed the pea under the bed
She whispered to him, "She'll feel you if she is true"
"This," she said, "will test her princess virtue"

In the morning, the mother asked how she slept
"I felt something hard under me and heard a voice," the princess wept
The mother took the pea out and it spoke to the her 
"Mother, this is the princess I deserve." 

The princess screamed as she looked at the talking pea 
Surely, this couldn't be the prince, but is he? 
She held him in her hand and spoke softly 
"Are you the prince?" the princess waited patiently
"I am," he said, "you've passed my test."
Who knew that a marriage between a pea and a princess would be the best?