Puppet

January 23, 2018

Dear Insecurity,

The constant nagging voice, whose words I hear inside,

The tiny little critic, always looking over my shoulder, and standing by my side.

Maybe tiny doesn't describe you, because you seem to have a lot of weight.

Every input by you holds influence, with sharp words ready to annihilate.

My actions and decisions are always trapped beneath your glare,

I can never seem to find any peace since you always feel the need to share.

¨Too plain¨ ¨Too Boring¨ ¨Too uptight¨ ¨Not Enough¨

I've become so accustomed to you being there, making my life just a little more rough.

Your speech, I´ve known my whole life, so much so that it's basically my own

But if you'd be willing to oblige, there's one thing i'd like to know:

How can you criticize and berate me, when i’m the one you reside inside

How can you jump on my every thought and pounce on my every move, always ready to chide?

How can you make me detest writing, as if i have a loose screw?

You make me see all the uneven rhymes and words that don't follow the groove

Just as this one is bound to do.

You are my scratched out words, my eraser marks and pencil shavings.

My self-doubt and mental blocks when half the time writing is what I'm craving.

You are my scrutinous stares at my stomach, back, and thighs,

You are the harsh words whispered in my ear that I need to go on a diet.

This love-hate relationship we have seems to only end in you telling me lies

So I ask, I plead, can you, for a little while, just be quiet?

Sincerely, with love

Your Pawn

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