Pushed

There are defining moments

In which you feel

Propelled or pushed to success.

These moments drive you

To keep living,

But what about the moments

Where you are pushed too hard?

What defines the moments

In which we are propelled

From the moments where

We are dragged

As if a heavy wave swept us away?

I am pushed in several ways.

I push myself to make good grades.

I push myself to be loyal.

I push myself to be kind.

I push myself to be human.

I push myself to live

Especially when times are hard. 

But where does it end?

I am pushed away by the one I love

And by the ones who love me.

I am pushed by my mother to do better

Even in areas where I feel satisfied in.

I am pushed to keep my secret life;

A life that I feel I have been handed.

I feel pushed to make others happy.

Are these the factors that pushed me

Over the edge

And into the ocean? 

Nay.

I am stronger than that.
I was shoved over the edge 

Not by someone else,

But by myself. 

I pushed myself 

Into this sea of depression.

I drove myself to insanity.

I push myself to be perfect

Because I cannot accept anything less.

I want to please everyone,

A seemingly impossible task.

I want to please everyone, 

But have I taken the time

To see if I am pleased?