Read Between the Lines

I am a contradiction.
Found under the exact definition,
yet reading the words found in the thesaurus.

I am a contradiction.
Asking for more time,
but cringing when there’s too much of it.
Each second, minute, hour
either wasted or too busy.
A social butterfly,
deciding to stay in its cocoon.
Eager to speak and never holding my tongue,
but hiding away from the light.

I am a contradiction.
Appreciating fine diction,
but never finding the right words.
26 letters in the alphabet.
no combination of them ever doing me justice.
Afraid of the dark,
containing a soul that knows no light.
Looking for and avoiding monsters under the bed,

never turning away from the one in the mirror.

I am a contradiction,
An open book,
nothing but blank pages.
A spirit painted with every color,
staring at a blank canvas.
A gypsy at heart,
with only one home.
Free-spirited, wild, adventurous.
Tangled in the roots of the only place I’ve ever known.
Trying to expand my branches,
the bark too sturdy to let go.

I am a contradiction.
Scared of letting others have my heart,
giving a piece of it to everyone.
Holding my chest steady,
gripping so hard that I was my own worst heartache.
God was always there and I believed in his word,
but her lips are so sweet, she is heaven on earth.
He says it is an abomination and sin,
so if loving her is illness to His world
I will gladly burn with no place next to Him.

For everything that was deemed wrong,
felt so right.

I am a contradiction.
Always meaning what I say,
but never believing a word of it.

This poem is about: 
Me

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