On realizing that emotions can't be buried

It has taken me
a very long time
to come to this point,
but I’m realizing now
after eighteen years
of my life
that it is okay to feel.
I spent so many months
of my life
burying my emotions
under piles of dirt
until I couldn’t
feel them
anymore.
I was numb,
but I didn’t
know it
then.
I look back now
and I see
that I was wrong
and that I should have
cried and screamed
and laughed and ranted
in those moments,
while I could.
I see now that
I have to let myself
feel what I feel
and that it is
okay to cry,
because you cannot
hold everything in
forever,
and if you try,
you will break.
So do not break,
because you are not weak.
You are strong for
having felt something,
anything,
ever.
So feel.
Just feel.

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