The Reason

The Reason

YO!

Before I begin I have to say sorry

But I really do need to share this sad story

A story of a man who had all the glory

But by his own hand turned it to shame, fear and worry

.

A story of a man who was always smart

Strong like a gun and fast as a dart

A man who had the advg of the headstart

Who acted the part

But now

he’s breaking apart

He had the respect and envy of his peers

He could sleep @ night w/out fears

He was one of the best

At least better than the rest

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Looking back now he was living the dream

AUGH! If only I can go back he would scream

What more than I had can I ask?

Now just being alive is a very hard task

He used to be used to being 1^st

Now he’s a failure, a nobody, like a bubble that burst

He’s now feeling very weak

He’s suffering constant fatigue

Its on his heart a very heavy weight

But alas! It is too late

He senses nothing now from ppl but sheer hate

Where are the days where he couldn’t get enough

Of love

And now

Wow

His phone won’t even ring

He doesn’t remember any recent compliment or anything

If only sooner

he knew

What his actions will lead to

Then those actions he would not do

He tells me and you

He even now has no comfort zone

Not even when he’s @ home

And Especially when he’s alone

He has no mission

He lost his vision

Nowadays he’s not functioning

Not thinking

And only feels he is sinking

And it’s rlly stinking

For many hours, at his ceiling, he would stare

And the time passes by, but he doesn’t care

There’s actually nothing to see up there

But his mind asks what? how? and where?

And sometimes his mind blocks and it would be an empty stare

But one thing’s for certain He stopped to care

He doenst care

He doenst care

What he wear

He doesn’t care

For his messy hair

And after being the smartest Buddy

He now doesn’t even care to study

Nothing to him now Matter

He’s eating junk and becoming fatter

And day by day feeling sadder

Is this depression?

Is this consequence of a wrong action?

Or Is it a combination of the former and the latter?

He now would contemplate

And wish he con’td straight

He wishes to return to the exact unknown date

Where it all started falling apart

And set things straight

And not wait

Until he reaches the level he is in now, which he sincerely hate

He now thinks for so long

Where did he go wrong

And after thinking he was nicely strong

Now, he’s very frail

& believe me, he IS pail

The thought that, all he ever did was in vain

Is causing him tremendous agony & pain

In fact, His current streak

Is feeling scared and weak

7 days a week.

He wants to act mad and go door to door

And tell all people: I’ve hit rock bottom and even failed more

Wait!

Now all his problems crashed to his mind and weighed

Now he is so lonely and he is soo afraid

all the gd memories are beginning to fade

he thinks  in haste

his life seems a waste

after the happiness and success were erased

he remembers no pleasure

but the recent heavy pressure

that he cannot measure

If life’s a race,

He tells me

Then I’m certainly standin in my place

He looks at me

Blows a heavy sigh and afterwards..

He Says: I’m even movin’ backwards

oh! He suddenly remembers That quote on quote friend

that so called pal who told him that all rules should be bend

he remembers how that dude caused all his moral to fly with the wind

and how he led him to an emptiness, with no purpose or cause to defend

that so called friend

caused our man nothing

but staying up late

and empty wallet

and what do you call it?

Having fun you call it?

Well, our man would beg to differ

He remembers with a shiver

Every wrongdoing he ever did

And begins to cry like he suddenly got hit

But it is way deeper

And the pain is much steeper

It is in reality

Breaking his mentality

Testing his sanity

He is now unbalanced and turning

As he try to dry

The falling tears that are burning

If those tears had a cleansing effect

Then it would be perfect

But rather they burn like fire

As the number of memories go higher

He tells me … of the voice

In his head.. makin’ noise

Tellin him… he’s got no choice

But to quit and stop trying

He tells me crying

That he succumbed to slowly dying

Dying inside

Which he hide

On the outside

Hides that with the fakest of smiles

But it doesn’t matter, cuz it’s all lies.

He remembers how his daydreams were so vivid

That he expected to achieve it and live it

within maximum 5 years

He remembers in tears

He remembers the old days

The previous phase

Where he was constantly motivated

And now he can hardly get out of his bed

With that said

And with the memories filling up his head

Its turning him crazy

Everything seems hazy

He feels much more than despair

WHAT I DID TO MYSELF IS NOT FAIR

He’s full of guilt and regret

&His face suddenly turns red

And he stood and felt much dread

and Suddnly moved to take a look at the mirror ahead

take a look at the mirror ahead?

Why did he do that for?

yo!

He wanted to know

How he looked in his all time low

It’s an act of self pity

But unfortunately

It just increased his depression

As he begins to mutter and crazily mention

where is my mansion

where is my mansion

the mansion I promised myself to earn

ooh! His tears now literally burn

yo, suddenly

He stares at my eyes and asks me surprisingly calmly

Where are my friends? where’s the support of my family?

where’s my will, my passion, my drive?

That were makin’ me alive

Where is my strive?

Where’s my wife

Where is my life?

He misses the sense

Of confidence

& happiness

That he didn’t appreciate at the time

Which he says is a true crime

Now his fears are so dense

Hence

Now he is livin a life of doubt, hesitation and uncertainty

Really, Wat a pity!

In short, he used to be truly happy

But currently

he feels messed up & bad

And simply,

he is really, really sad

At the end at the very last

After all his memories were pouring so fast

After hardly trying to analyze

And synthesize

And revise

suddenly a shout

He let  out

I figured it out!!

I figured it out!!

HE finally found it!

This must be it!

He is sure more than he ever was

That the answer he has

Is the reason

 for his decline

It’s so evident, it doesn’t need a sign

The reason why he changed from living a happy full life

Until he is now suffering to the extent of thinking of killing himself with the knife

And Our man was @ least wise

  To realize

that he had a chance to again rise

If he can fix the reason of his fall

And that’s not impossible at all

After now knowing that

The reason

Of his pain

is that he turned away

from The source of all the good he ever had

That made him a happy, successful lad

And the source from which he drew

The power

Now he knew

I DESERVE ALL THIS & MORE
for

I purposely

Turned away

And disobeid

The One and Only

All powerful

All mighty           

GOD

Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=znsxioWj_tc