Reassure through Insecure

All my life I have struggled to know what I am

Who I am

Testing myself

All I see is an exam

I think to myself

Am I good enough

Yes I am

But I call my bluff

I see other people

And how they strive

But see I wonder

How will I survive

Its tough enough

When you question yourself

I hope it’s the last time

But actually it’s the twelth

I doubt myself

And worsen my health

It’s mental, emotional, and physical

So why can’t I love myself unconditional

Every year, hour, minute

And every second

My insecurities are on a perpetual cycle

And tear me down like a rifle

So, How would you feel if all you feel is fear

And fear what you feel

Yes it’s complicated

So, I smile because I feel obligated

Internally I’m not the same

Externally I pretend I’m sane

But these hardships blossom to flowers

Beautiful and strong ones

And bright in color

For I would never switch my life for another

Although I struggle to find the good in me

It’s what makes me me

I know there’s no such thing as perfect

But I can’t stand to see myself as anything less

I'm hard on myself and it messes me up

I’d drown my insecuritiesin a tub

But this is me

This is how I learn

Although it may be a lesson

It’s a hard one

For every lack of confidence

There’s some that I earn

For all those doubts

Knowledge and inspiration is returned