Regard

You see,

attention does not

equal love, but

my brain just can't

seem to get that.

When I'm not

what's in your mouth

or hands or eyes,

I rot.

I count up

the seconds it takes

for a notification

to appear on the

phone screen,

and every second more

is a louder scream.

A simple smile from

the stranger across the hall

can save the day,

but when the one

next to me walks

away,

my legs are

quicksand.

My lungs fill

with the sand water mixture.

You're sitting right

across from me,

but I'm convinced

death's touch is

closer

to me

than you

ever have been.