Resting In Peace

I never thought the day would come

When you didn’t come home

And the pain that I felt

Just made me melt

Just to think that you would go

And not come back

It’s like a runaway dog on the low

But I knew your be back

Like a girl on that crack

You left me broken

And it wasn’t working

I was so broken

I was hurting

The pain that I felt

Did more than melt

It tore and poured into my sores

But it didn’t make me hit the floor

Instead it made me roar

Katy Perry

But I don’t have the eye of the tiger

But what I’m about to say is more than fire

See when you left

You left us poor

Without a door

You left us without any hope

And that wasn’t dope

See while you were running around playing honey

And disappearing

We had no money

And now you're appearing

See while we were struggling

You were cuddling

And see that’s just the beginning

But I’m not gonna take you to the end

I’m gonna take you straight to the middle

See everyday that you didn’t come home

Made me die inside

Because you would leave like the outside

And you would set our hopes down every time you wouldn’t come home

But see I don’t care no more

I made it clear

Why because you disappeared

And I’m not gonna have you pouring lies into my ears

Cause you know just what I want to hear

See when you left

You left without a trace

So we couldn’t mess with your paste

See when you left

I was just a little girl

But I saw you had a new girl

So you weren’t caring for me no more

See when the days turned into months

And the search for a father figure hunt

Was like chasing a duck

Pointless

See the hate that I felt for you had gotten so strong

That I turned to smoke with a bong

See you left me hanging

That I wanted to grab a gun and start banging

But I knew if I killed you I would have been danging

Sitting behind the prison walls praying

Praying that I don’t meet the devil at his gates of hell

While you went off and lived well

And I hate the fact that my last name is Bell

Because anything that comes from you doesn’t sit well

See you did more than leave

You fled

And you think because you're back now we’re gonna build you a shed

See you did more than leave

You messed up

You played us to look like a set up

And let’s not get started on all the promises that you made

Even though it was nothing but games that you played

See when June 27th hit you were nowhere to be found

You broke the bond

Between love and hate

And even though my brothers flew into heavens gates

I still remember that cake that was baked

See I became depressed

Why because I wouldn’t let it rest

Seeing my brothers in their casket

Went straight to my chest

Seeing all the pain that my mom felt made me go West

West from the feet of the throne of my God

But I didn’t buy a storage

Pods

Instead I brought hope

Thinking that one day my life would be dope

But that became more of my nope

And it only became harder when the kids would pick on me at school

Because everything they said wasn’t always so cool

I was different

I didn’t fit in

And I never really had a true friend

But that didn’t bring me to the end

I wiped the tears from my eyes

And said my prayers each night

Like Dear God,

I know my brothers are with you

Which is too good to be true

And every time I turn

I think of my burns

And every tear that I would cry

Even then Is till tried to hide

Even then I still tried to deny

I tried to deny the fact that I am loved

And how I am beautiful just like a dove

And all I ever wanted to do was make someone proud

Proud enough to call me their own

Proud enough for me to stand on my own

But that’s all in the past

My life is moving too fast

When I wrote this I was feeling crappy

But one day I will be happy

And before I close

I wrote this to show how I was feeling

And even though the pain is healing

And my skin is still peeling

I ain’t the one who's killing

Cause I ain’t the one who’s out there dealing