I am standing,

Standing in a crowd screaming,

Screaming at the top of my lungs

But no one seems to hear,

And if they do, they only hear a small piece,

They don't hear the pain

They don't see the hopelessness,

How do they not see me?

See me begging,

Begging to be saved

Saved from myself.

 

I am running,

Running from the past, 

Everyone always saying its just the past and that the past can no longer haunt me,

But its destroying me,

Bringing me down

Saying that I will always be worthless,

Saying that no matter how hard I try the past will always be chained to me,

I am a prisoner to my past.

 

Then I hear something,

I hear a voice, 

A voice telling me to get over it,

That its not that bad.

Not that bad?

How would they know?

How would they know what I have been though?

How could they understand what its like?

What its like to be abandoned, 

What its like to not be wanted, 

How do they know what its like to be forgotten? 

Forgotten by a father. 

Then they say that I'm better off,

Better off without him. 

How can I be better off without him when I'm the one carrying his shame?

His shame that he left to me.

 

They don't understand what it is like to wear a mask,

A mask that never comes off ,

While everyone around me is happy 

I am stuck behind a mask,

A mask built out of shame, 

Out of pain,

And out of exhaustion.

This mask that never comes off 

This mask that hides what I am really feeling,

This mask that with every hour of everyday it seems to grow heavier and heavier,

An emotional weight that no one understands,

This mask that I carry around 

And no one will ever see beneath it,

No one will know the wreck I really am inside,

No one will see the hatred that I have,

The hatred that I have for myself 

The hatred that I have for my past 

 

No will save me, 

How can someone save me when they cannot see me? 

I need to be saved,

Saved from myself

Because I cannot fight this battle any longer,

The weight is too heavy, 

And it only ever grows.

The hatred that I feel towards myself, 

It only grows 

Day after day I seem to hate myself more and more, 

When will someone come and save me?

Save me from myself.