Saved

48 hours in deep
Something rushing through my veins
Something that made me re-think my possibilities

I thought I was set free
Able to express my rage as I please
But I was a captive slave to self denial

A year of messages had passed by
Ignored but never unheard

My thoughts were finally silenced
Repressed and buried under the preferred substance

There came a night when nothing worked
The world stopped being on my side
I could feel every ounce of…
Pain, abandonment, and loneliness
That I have ever felt!

This night gave me courage…motivation
To CHANGE!

I had to take a step
Make any type of movement so I could be seen
I was not only seen I was heard

The moment was precious
My eyes could not see
My mind could not think
But my heart was open and ready to be changed

I totally melted away
There is no other feeling that is greater
I got saved.

Every part of me was broken that night
But there was peace in my heart
And that peace was a gift that was given me
Because I was hurting for one too many days

I had an encounter with the most high
He took EVERY part of me, seen and unseen
And shattered it! Destroyed it! He dislocated everything about me!
BUT…he took all the brokenness
And made everything about me new
I had become a new creation

That same beautiful night that I was set free
I lost everything
I had nowhere to go
This earth spit me out
I was NOT wanted
I was NOT heard
I WAS hated
I was put to the test

And I passed. I am here. I am wanted. I am heard. I am loved.