In school you learn a

In school you learn a lot these days

The utmost important things to know

Like how to draw the US flag

And how to spell Van Gough

I know the quadratic equation

And every element’s atomic mass

How to tell rock from mineral

And the appropriate use of a dash

I know every number to pi

And what kind of pie the queen liked best

Because knowing cherry vs. rhubarb

Is sure to be one of life’s greatest tests

Lincoln’s uncle’s dentist’s name?

That my friends is Bruce

As for the height of the Eiffel Tower

It’s 1,062

In school you learn a lot these days

The utmost important things it’s so

But how to do taxes or get a job?

Eh, that I’ll never know