screaming

sometimes I just want to lose it all 

through the glitter into the air 

watch it all fall 

apart.  

silent screaming in my head  

running away  

falling on the bed 

tears fall 

down.  

I can feel the hairline cracks 

crinkles round my eyes  

all the things I lack 

showing through 

as my face 

falls.  

Then I remember:   

the times before when we daydreamed  

our school into a wonderland  

covered in glittering frost.  

we enjoyed being found  

almost as much as lost.  

the time I laughed so hard  

I spat water all over you  

which only made us  

laugh harder.  

water streaming  

from our eyes,  

so much happy.  

The time you told me  

I had eyes  

that embraced my soul 

and that was the soul 

you wanted to embrace

always. 

and my eyes crinkled up  

like smiling raisins 

as you kiss   

the tip of 

my nose 

and my worries 

away