Screaming Infidelities

Laying here awake thinking and not wanting to believe what I hear. I don’t want any of it to be true, but deep down I know it is. I can’t describe how bad it hurts, it’s beyond words. I would love to cry, but all my tears are gone. It’s like betrayal, but far worse. And to top it all off, you have not a care in the world for how its affecting me. How do people put up with this? I know i’m not alone in this feeling, and I feel bad for people who have been through this multiple times. I know I can’t do this again. I’m always told how I don’t deserve this, how anyone who is willing to cheat on me must be an absolute idiot, and how they would never give up someone so amazing. Well, I don’t believe it. If I was so great, then this wouldn’t keep happening, I wouldn’t keep hurting. But it does, and I do. I can’t care about this any longer, its just eating away at me. If I don’t stop it soon, there won’t be anything left.