Sea deep

I want to Thank the good men . The ones that ain't afraid to repent Men with ambition so hot  keepin his heart lit Changed my perception I wasn't Aware of this type of kin  Thought they didn't exist...Been around some kind of shade has left me with marks so dark Devil himself wouldn't dare step to them crooked ways Though that's past tense . I dont seek revenge, moved on from those  primitive days, Sometimes it crosses my mind but I push it off and remembering were I'm at today Sometimes love has me, real afraid ...Running back to The queen pin to hide my pain..scars that bring me real shame. Sinking my ship again .looking for my anchor in this emotional winds.  im defensive when your just trying to be a friend , i got to check myself, really step back and look at Self, drowning in my own head trying to escape what I feel again,frustrated ,cause you don't understand, makes me hate myself ..prayin again giving thanks just to save myself Kept it one hundred  with me never frottin what you felt , just calling out what you see.. man you the man you kept it clean...more importantly you saw me behind my pain never judged my scars You knew they weren't self-inflicted, telling me  it aint me it's them thats twisted Making my worries melt, i know how tough you are now breaking down my walls, got me opening up to myself Understood my position in the industry,  helping me push my wieght  you made nothing out of something and for that i give thanks  Kickn it more everyday got us closer together but still hearts far apart,. It's an understatement to say we both on the same page but on different chapter of life , that's why we fall back , but not falln apart.. The only thing they keeps me away ,i be prayen at Night that someday we would be liven our dreams , I was tryn to show you ways to heal convince you  love wasn't what hurt you but selfish women hungry for money run on greed sidetracked by the thrill .  i know you know i pray to God askn forgiveness he know we don't always drive around clean .. I was just tryn to survive and get out the hood. I had future plans going to school &We were both willing to make dreams happen if we had to bend the rules. I hope he sees we got bills and i know you got baby's to feed , i had no family to rely on but you knew I put my trust in God,so we got to get paid even though at times it scares me