See You In Court
I remember the first time you did it
The first time you made me feel like
my body was no longer my own
I remember the first, second, and third
time you made me bleed
or when I would hold back tears
so you wouldn't call me weak
and then you would beg me
Beg me to fall to my knees
Beg me to tell you that I had always loved you
I said it so much that I began to agree
I began to believe I loved you
I wonder if that was your plan all along
To make me think I loved you
just in case you could get away with it
Yet I still wonder if maybe it was true
if my empty words were as full as
the tears you would create in my eyes
I still wonder this after I ran out
of these tears when I became numb to you
or when you told me I wasn't as "hot"
as the girls you would see in porn
or as hot as I could be if I didn't eat
As if I already didn't know
or needed to hear you say it again
But I'm still not over what you did
and I don't know if I will ever be
I can't sleep in my bed without
feeling your hands crawl over my skin
I can't drive without checking
to see if you're behind me again
I can't see my self without the bruises
you would leave on my frail body
I can't stop thinking about why
I didn't see what you had done sooner
I wonder what I would've done
if I could see through you earlier
or if you ever realized how much
you hurt me and tore me down
Maybe I will never know what
your plan was or if you had one
or even how I really felt about you
but I do know that you changed me
yet you have not ruined or wilted me
and soon you will see that I'm not done
I have not finished my fight
👁 8💬 0
Something wrong with this poem?
Replies are closed for this poem.
If you or someone you know is struggling, you are not alone.
988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline — call or text 988, 24/7. Crisis Text Line — text HELLO to 741741.
Your Poem's Voice
See what makes your poem unique — its voice, energy, themes, and the literary traditions it draws from.
Comments (0)
Comments are closed for this poem.