Self-Deception

I am a sad story.
I have been one my entire life.
Tragic
Empty
Yet full of silence with only
The sounds of a heart
Beating
Pounding
Slowly
Definitely.

I did not ask of my past:
"Shape me into the strength
That everyone sees"
For I have been sad
And this, I remain.

For this is what I desire.
It will have gone
Obscured ‘til this moment.
I am my past
And I create the now.

Because even at my best
I forever am
And want
To be painted as a sad story.