self destructive behavior

Invite you in to not feel so empty

If only for a moment 

Because what else is there to offer

Besides a warm body

For you to find release

When my heart is cold and broken?

Your fingers graze my skin

And I feel nothing. 

Crushed by the weight of your body

And crushed by my own expectations

Yet I still feel nothing. 

Surrounded by sharp breaths, quiet moans,

Wandering hands and nervous glances

Why can't I feel something? 

My body moves with yours,

Almost without thought or question.

But I've found myself here before,

Wishing for the ending.

My body has always been the place

That men come for distraction. 

So treat me well or use me up,

The honest truth is… 

I probably won't know the difference 

And I will still feel nothing.