Self-inflicted Anguish by m.n.i.w

Self - inflicted anguish. The feelings I can't vanquish. Can't change the picture that was painted. My story of optimism tainted. Stained by the faults of the world. I beat myself up just to finish off what the world left. I search for life's meanings in things that lack depth. I'm searching for God in the bottom of a barrel. I'm looking for love in the dumps. I'm trying to illuminate the pitch black. But all the world does is pitch black back. Soon I'm engulfed in shades of darkness. Shadows so heartless. Asking the Lord's foe for pardons. Spare my soul the tragedy. Indeed that's all I've seen. I yearn for eternal bliss. A life so serene. Sins infect my mind. Morality fails to intervene. I'm approaching self - destruction. While chasing ventilation. Trying to find a way while my soul is in decay. I journey through jungles. I exit with scars. I ask Him to forgive me for being lost. Because I tend to answer when the darkness calls.