Senior Stasis and Other Things

Wed, 10/14/2015 - 11:54 -- eelouis

Location

99006
United States
47° 54' 25.254" N, 117° 32' 15" W

the last time you heard from me

i was flying far off into the sky

or perhaps I was falling

I wasn’t sure of where I was going

or if i would ever make it

i still don’t know where I am

i was happy

really and truly happy

then i lost myself

and i’m here

 

and the beautifully broken birdie’s wings

have healed

or maybe they were never broken to

begin with

she’s been trying at flying for quite

some time

but she’s lost for good

the rope is gone

and no one is here to save her

 

and everyone from every window

is calling her name

and she isn’t sure of where to go

whose ledge will protect her

and whose will smash her

reach inside and clip her wings

again and again

when will she learn

not to trust these people

the one’s who stroke her feathers

then turn around and pluck them

from her bitter battered soul

 

i’ve been working on my body

and i’m okay with it now

i’m piloting this stardust being

through the milky way

but i feel my conclusion is around the corner

and my introduction needs work

because you still don’t know me

 

haven’t you been paying attention

don’t you know

it’s me

it’s me

i’m the one who screams at night

yelling and bellowing til i’m blue

in the moon and not even he can

save me. i’m the seeds you blow

off dandelions

everywhere and nowhere

and you’re always glad to see me

except for when you’re not.

i am the lily pads frogs perch upon in

stagnant sorrowful puddles

I’m the face you see in your dreams.

the girl who cuts corners made of

glass and cries when she’s tired and

spills herself onto the floor

so strap me into a hot air balloon

and send me to the stars

i am here and i am me

i am emma estess louis

and i am lost and forever wandering

 

mayhaps, one swell splendid day

i’ll get to where i’m going

and i’ll frame that day and hang it on the wall

and we’ll all laugh at me because i’m

stronger and i did it.

for now i’ll make my peace with the trees and knock on the wall at night

i’ll exist as a whisper and kiss the stars

when i get there.

i’ll be your little dreamer

even all the way over there

and I'll live on through what

i leave in you

This poem is about: 
Me

Comments

Need to talk?

If you ever need help or support, we trust CrisisTextline.org for people dealing with depression. Text HOME to 741741