The shadow that covered me

Shattered windows glistening in the summer sun
Light that forms into shadow due to my father's liquor
and his favorite sunday rum
This overcast covers me with pangs and distress
Leaving me bruises as though this hurricane
left me with nothing, not even my name
Stepping into this black hole
That leads me to a broken place...
Broken,broken into fine damped soil
soil that fertilize and scattered along side my mother's grave
What is this place?
I feel so at ease
I want to reminisce back to the time Momma told me she loved me
Before she took her last breath...
I told her "please,please dont leave me" ...
A few hours later...
"beep,beep ,beep" that sound of that machine
was louder than the time
my father came home drunk and decided to beat me
In tears I shouted "come back this was just a bad dream,
everything was going to be alright momma, just believe me."
Why does this seem so familiar?
Like I entered a time machine
Going back in time as if this world was againsted me.
The imagin that overcast me
The noise that is stuck with me
Listen,I hear a noise, a flickering screech
One that can make the hair on your back stand.
Its the sound of..
Falling floors,open doors, mirrors of faces, and bazarre places.
Where am I?who am I?
This is not me...
I don't deserve this illusion that my father implanted in me.
Fake smile and laugh is now all behind me.
I want to live a life the way it should be.