She Is Not Beautiful

Location

She's not a beautiful girl.
She has a big nose and a silly smile and she
Doesn't always say the right things at the right times. 
No, she's not beautiful. 
She's seen a million pictures that can prove to her she is the "otherwise"
Her face isn't symmetrical, thighs and stomach fat hanging over the
tightly fitting seams of the clothes she adorns herself with.
She
Doesn't have the best sense of fashion. 
She
Doesn't know how to dress her body properly.
She
looks at other people often and wonders, "Why can't I just be them?"
Because she finds herself thinking that she'd rather be anybody but herself.
She looks in the mirror and sees a version of herself that makes her smile
And then sees a photograph that proves that
She 
has been viewing herself from eyes clouded in a false self-awareness. 
It's easy to say that she's always had a knack for turning a normal situation into something
Uncomfortable, whether it be by the way 
She
feels so completely or by the cues that are so often missed by her. 
Everyone has expectations of her that 
She
needs to be a little bit more like everybody else. Because how the hell could someone
So fat
So awkward
So visibly unfit for their own skin be somebody worthy of being themselves.
Those are the things that people say to 
Her.
And those are the things that she often finds haunt
Her.
But, after a long going process, she's begun to pick up the pieces that have fallen after being
Picked apart time and time again. She's figuring it out. 
Everyone will criticize her appearance but 
She 
knows that she's much more than that.
There's something beautiful in the way that she bubbles with joy at a good joke. 
Though know one is looking you can see every ounce of honesty in the creases around her eyes.
Her lips are full and pull tightly with a smile when she is offered the rare a compliment.
I'm sure if you looked deeply at her irises you would be able to see how truly grateful she is. 
Her
voice is a cascading waterfall of praise because 
She 
wants you to know that you are absolutely wonderful and 
You might not think so but, rest assured, she does.
If she touches you, I hope you feel the goose bumps on her skin because there is nothing
That she'd rather do than allow her fingers to brush over yours or through you hair.
Surely there is something quite beautiful in the way she knows you are so radiant.
She
lives for moments like this-- for knowing that she has struck love deep into your heart.
She
gives everyone the love she wishes she could receive.
And though her face is not symmetrical and she has a little extra baggage,
There is something so pure and effortless about
Her.

Comments

Need to talk?

If you ever need help or support, we trust CrisisTextline.org for people dealing with depression. Text HOME to 741741